8/26/10

guest post: embracing the unknown

 today's guest post is from ruth,
enjoy!

~~~


The notion of growing up and moving on is so universally true, isn't it? I've been letting this idea mull around inside of me lately, letting it soak into my bones and ooze into my cells, and I sit here, trying hard not to push against it and instead just see how it feels. When I read that Meg would be completing her final day of work and saying goodbyes and moving away and taking time off, that very human yearning inside of me sprung to life, the one where we all desire to be connected and have company and feel supported. Ah yes, I thought. We're really not alone at all. 


You see, I also just completed a last day of work. With a year of volunteer service under my belt, I finished July 30th and tried to forge ahead. Suddenly this new world opened before me, a world that I most likely would have been terrified of two months ago. I didn't have a job. I didn't have an income. I turned down grad school. I didn't have a schedule. I didn't have anything lined up. (Although, I did have student loan bills flooding in...) This whole month of August, lying before me, as if quietly whispering to me, daring me to revel in its splendor. 

And revel I have.

I was okay with the fact that I didn't have a job. I'm lucky enough to not have to face much more than loan bills just yet, so I took full advantage. In fact, I've come to savor every tiny second of this new found freedom! I hadn't realized how much my self really pined for some self-care, some true relaxation, some mental peace. It's extraordinary, really, how much I had deprived myself of these things, how much we all deprive ourselves of these things until we're so overwhelmed and inundated with daily life that it becomes hard to enjoy the things we truly value. I'm hoping that once I get back into the working world and have a regular schedule again (uh, what's that?), I'll be able to continue these practices and work them into a routine. Losing all this growth would be a shame. 


And August? What a fantastic time for transitions. As a kid, summers are just that, aren't they? That weird, limbo-ish, in-between time when you're not really sure what grade you're in, but you know you're sure okay with that. Growing up (because really--I still have to stifle a giggle when I call myself fully grown up), I find myself sometimes forcing things because they're supposed to be summer sentiments--you know, you're supposed to read summery books and watch summery movies and want to swim in a pool every chance you get. This summer, I've been experimenting with doing things because I really want to do them, not because they'll bring nostalgia of the summer of 1995. I've been camping (with friends, not my parents this time), and going to the beach for just an hour or so (because that's really all the sand I can take and hey, I can drive myself home whenever I want!), and picking vegetables out of the garden as a hobby (not a chore on a to-do list), and dipping my toes in the lake instead of jumping in (I always hated getting water in my ears, anyways). 


What have you been doing for yourself this summer?

Thanks, Meg, for having me here! I can't wait to read more from your guests :)

4 comments:

  1. i feel that same way. i spent so much of my energy on grad school, teaching, and wedding planning that it was nice to get away from it all.

    I've been enjoying it. just traveling europe. planning our trips. cooking for my husband. and just reading and being lazy. sometimes you need a little bit of that (:

    thanks for your post. & good luck on your next adventure!

    ReplyDelete
  2. Thank you for such a wonderful guest post, Meg! This and the words in "embracing the unknown" could not have come at a better time...a time when I too am feeling the same way!

    Liesl :)

    ReplyDelete
  3. I love your post. It rang so true to me. I'm going to live alone for the first time ever and it's going to either be great or really not great. Let's see if I can stand being alone with my thoughts.

    ReplyDelete

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