8/10/10

guest post: tips on how to improve your wife'liness

agh...
i am neck deep in boxes,
so let the guest posting begin!

this first post is by e
a newly british blogger
from the blog adam.and.e
which i have recently discovered and am
absolutely in love with!
enjoy...

 
preface:
my name is e and i recently married greatest guy in the whole wide world.
 we're both southerners living in england working hard on our british accents.
marriage is a new word for us so we take it one day at a time... and have fun along the way.
have i mentioned that before marriage i could only count on one hand how many meals i could cook?!
... uh huh, we're {and by we i mean ME} brand new grown-ups 
::tips on how to improve your wife'liness::
~and life in general~

{1}. ALWAYS follow ingredients and measure  properly when cooking a meal.
if you're like me and think you can "whip something up martha stewart style" with no cooking skills and have it turn out edible...  results are going to out very interesting. 
     
example: garlic mashed potatoes...
          too much milk +  unproperly chopped garlic cloves+ hand mixing everything in a nonstick pot= soupy/hot mashed inedible goo... oh yeah, and a ruined {brand new} pot.

{2}. ALWAYS make sure to have good hygiene. 
nobody likes a stinker. and if your like me {which is kinda manly in the smell factor} then carrying deodorant at ALL times is a musk... i mean MUST! to keep your good smellin' charm make sure your scent is always heavenly. 

example: applying deodorant...
forgetting to apply deo before you leave the house + leaving the spare inside your purse {which was left in the car... from the day before} + remembering that spare in inside your purse + quickly applying it {in the hot summertime while driving}= melting, hot lava running down the side of your body while screaming at the top of your lungs from pain and sheer panic because you just realized that your driving.

{3}. NEVER forget that your hubby is a visual. 
being told that i'm sexy by my man always boosts my confidence... and can sometimes impair my vision... literally. 

example: trying to live out up to my so-called sexiness.
 entering the room all slow and stuff+ doing the "birds'n the bees"+ attempting to gracefully be a visual for my hubs but getting a little too excited= falling off the bed butt naked and bruising my arm. 

{4}. ALWAYS have a "plan B" 
you never know what life will throw at you. if your like me life throws a ton 'o stuff your way so you've learned to have "plan b" handy.

example{s}: 
*planning an awesome hiking trip to the swiss alps+booking the wrong date + no refund+ losing 1 day of vaca time+ keeping your head held high and quickly planning something else = plan B 
* having dinner completely ready {and edible} on time+receiving a phone call from the hubs saying he's running late= plan B
* planning to take a romantic bike ride+ seeing a little deer+ accidently scaring the deer+ the deer getting caught in a fence= plan B
*  having good intentions to go to church+ forgetting to set an alarm+ waking up uber late= plan B
* attempting to get in shape+ buying a big bag of gummy bears+ the hubs suggesting thai more than once a week for dinner+ lots of rain during the week+lack of motivation= plan B

{5}. ALWAYS be familiar with your community.
if your like me then your community {for the net 3 years} is probably going to be a  british one filled with livestock that roam around freely between the booming metropolis of cambridge.

example: if your not familiar with the people and animals around you then you could end up looking like a crazy person.
* people: taking a leisurely walks+ throwing out smiles and friendly hello's to all the locals+ blank stares in return for a good 9 seconds= total confusion... and checking myself to make sure my fly isn't down or goo isn't in my teeth.
*animal: excitement about my brand new camera+ finding some cows+ getting really close to a cow+ walking away with a sense of accomplishment for having some strong photos+ cow starting to follow+ thinking that i've made a new friend+ kinda freaking out+ me running+ cow running with me{or at me}=  freaked out by cows for the rest of my life... and looking like an idiot running through the shrubs with my hands violently waving in the air.


if you follow these 5 steps then your bound to have you husband "wow'ing" you in no time! 
...or at least your pots'n pans will be cookable
you'll smell nice without severe burns
 your body will have no bruises
you wont waste money on vacations that you weren't there for
and animals wont chase you! 

cheers,
e

6 comments:

  1. awww this is adorable. i don't have to worry about this for a while i don't think. but i wanna go check out her blog!!

    ReplyDelete
  2. this was so cute and funny. I just loved it!

    (And I could TOTALLY relate to the cow story! When I was a kid, I was on my grandpa's farm picking apples from one of the apple trees bordering the cow pasture, when I started to feel like someone was watching me. That someone turned out to be a cow, who was RIGHT behind me and who had a taste for apples. It followed me all the way across the field, even after I threw my apple at it. And now, yes, I too am scared of cows. Close up. But now when I see them from afar in the car. Then I moo at them.)

    It's lovely to meet you, E.

    ReplyDelete
  3. thanks meg for letting me best a guest blogger!! ps- good luck with all those boxes!!

    kristin- i'm so glad you can relate! you don't realize how big those things are until there RIGHT BESIDE YOU. haha.

    ReplyDelete
  4. CUTEEE! Thanks, Meg. I will def be checking it out!:)

    ReplyDelete
  5. Adam and Izzie are a lovely couple! =)
    I always visit their blog.
    And your blog is also beautiful!


    (I'm sorry for my horrible English. I do not speak your language very well.)

    XOXO =]

    ReplyDelete
  6. This is such a funny post, going to chech out her blog!

    ReplyDelete

i love reading your comments - please drop me a note to say hi!

Related Posts Plugin for WordPress, Blogger...